The worst meal ever....

Friday started out as a normal day. We got up, ate breakfast, checked our email, ate some cold cafeteria lunch, (no, this was not the worst meal of the day...) then went to meet the other UND students who were coming to campus for the UND/USST graduation. We met them along with some of our USST students. We all split off into groups. Elizabeth and I went off with a girl name Tracy and got a look at her dorm room. The room was about the same size as the one I had my first two years of college. The difference was, hers was meant to hold 4 girls and mine seemed crowded with 2. But actually, Tracy was quite lucky because her room only had 2 girls in it. The other two had graduated and moved out. This won't last long though...the room will be filled come August or sooner. The bathrooms were also quite different. The ones in our dorm rooms seemed like a spa compared to these. That's one thing I won't miss when I get back to the States...normal toilets and shower water that doesn't smell like it came from a pond.

Next, we all met at the new library on campus for the graduation. The ceremony was held in both Chinese and English. There was a very good translator who was actually one of the graduates. It was quite small, maybe 70 students or so, and lasted a bit over an hour. Then we walked over to the gates to take some pictures. After the pictures, Dean Wang invited us all to join the graduates for their banquet. We all said we would. I asked the Dean if it was going to be held in the same place as we had lunch the first day we arrived. He said it was. So I lead the group over to the cafeteria/restaurant. The entire way there, people kept asking me if I knew where we were going. I said yes, but in my mind I was thinking, "Of course I know where we're going...I've only been living here almost 2 weeks!" When we got there, no one was in the place. Dean Wang and our teacher, Victoria Beard, were chatting away and slowly mosied in. The Dean was quite surprised to see the place empty. Even he didn't know where this banquet was! I told Elizabeth, "Let the record show...this wasn't my fault. I took us to where he said it would be." She laughed and smiled and shared the same sentiment as me. So now I let the Dean take the lead. He finally found the place where the banquet was and thus began the worst meal ever.

To preface this: I am a fairly adventurous eater. I was very picky when I was younger and still am so some extent, but I will try almost anything once. Doesn't mean I will like it, but I will at least try it. The cold dishes that were set out in front of us looked straight out of the second round of Fear Factor. There was this cold watermelon soup with some indistinguishable white gelatinous blobs in it, cold meat with plenty of bones still in it, some sort of boiled duck egg that had been soaked in soy sauce or something like that so it turned black, a dish that looked like pickled olives, some beans, and a dish of peanuts. I tried the white gelatinous watermelon soup and the cold, bony meat. No thanks. I also tried the beans. After I ate my second or third (which took me quite a while because they were extremely hard to chew) one of the students laughed at me and said, "you don't eat the whole thing, you just eat the seeds inside." That information would have been helpful 5 minutes earlier. Needless to say, I pretty much kept to the peanuts, hoping the hot food would be more appetizing. Think again! There were these nasty deep fried cheese sticks, except picture it with an awful breading and something I don't even think was cheese, a dish that I'm pretty sure was all fat with some sort of glaze on it, a duck soup with all bones and cold broth, and several other just as unappetizing dishes.

So far, the food was awful, but that was okay. I wasn't especially hungry to begin with. So, why then, you may be wondering, was this the worst meal ever? Let me tell you...the Chinese do not hold their liquor very well. They get drunk very easily and very quickly. Plus, in their culture, if someone gives a toast, it is expected for everyone to drink their whole glass. There were three things to drink at the table: Coke, Sprite, and beer. Since I don't like beer, I opted for Sprite. Since it was their graduation and the beer was free, almost all the Chinese students opted for the beer. They were all getting a bit silly and tipsy which was actually quite entertaining. Then, one guy took it upon himself to chug a whole bottle of beer. Again, in China, things are a bit different. Their beer bottles are about 3 times the size of ours. And again, they do not hold their liquor very well. Everyone was cheering him on and taking pictures. Now, my fellow students from UND, not to be outdone, grab bottles and start challenging the Chinese to chugging contests. My friend Matt challenged a guy at his table. Everyone was kind of milling around all the tables at that point. I was at another table taking some pictures. I did not see this chugging contest going on behind me. Matt won quite easily. The Chinese student not only lost the contest, but he also lost his dinner...all over my skirt. He immediatly started apologizing profusely and I started gagging and running to the bathroom. I almost lost the handful of peanuts I had eaten from the meal, but managed to get myself under control. When I saw that the sink alone was not going to clean me up, I bolted for my room to change and Elizabeth came with me. I got some very strange looks from the people I walked past, so we power-walked the whole way there. Elizabeth threw my skirt in the wash and I headed straight to the shower. After I got all cleaned up, Elizabeth bought me some ice cream at the store downstairs and we walked back to the dinner. We were half grossed-out and half laughing.

In the words of the infinitely wise Señora Lang, "It will make a good story."